Some days are blessings, while others are filled with struggles. But each day I am thankful to be alive. I cannot complain about the events leading to this point in my life... The chapters to my novel are not complete, and I have yet to reach the cliffhanger.
And I'm okay with that.
For each day is a new day, and I am up for the challenge (most days).
A few weeks ago, at work, we were encouraged to get to know the staff a little more by answering a question on a poster each day. The questions were "Why do you love music?" and "what is something you've always wanted to do?" without hesitation, I made my way to transcribe my answers. Blank spaces were sparse on the music poster, while the something we've always wanted to do was very bare.
When I read the question, I knew exactly what I've always wanted... Not a pony, or a mansion. Not even a goose that lays golden eggs.
I've always wanted to fall in love -- Maybe not like in the fairy tales, and maybe not like some cliche romance novel -- but I cannot wait for the day when I fall in love.
Seeing as I'm 21 and single, this didn't seem strange to me. But as my 30's, 40's, 50's and even older coworkers glanced at the board, some were struck with awe, pity and amusement by my response. While no one knew that was my answer, I watched as the reactions came spilling in. They were feeling amusement by my lack of love, but also sadness that I had never fallen in love. Is that not natural?
I was confused.
I have loved the ideas of many a things throughout my life... I have enjoyed moments, and I love my family. But I have never truly fallen in love.
Maybe I should feel pity for myself, trust me, sometimes I do. But whatever the case may be... I want to fall in love. With all my heart, butterflies-causing-chaos-in-my-stomach-kind-of-love.
...
Although it may not happen tonight or tomorrow, maybe not next week or even a year from now... I look forward to the day that it happens. It may be unexpected and unplanned, and I'm quite alright with that. For as long as I can remember, I have longed for the day to come. It will be a celebrated time in my life, and I cannot wait. Yes, I joke about the idea of seeing my future boyfriend walking through the door at Coffee Emporium, but maybe one day it will happen. And maybe it will make all the difference.
As they say, "love is a many splendid thing."
